Friday, August 3, 2012

It's A Wonderful Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day

Now wait...now listen...now listen to me.

I beg of you not to do this thing, not to let this thing happen. If the gays get hold of this restaurant, there'll never be another decent business built in this town. They've already got charge of the media. They've got the universities. They've got all the decent cities. Christ, they even got Disneyworld.

And now they're after us. Why? Well, it's very simple. Because we're cutting in on their lifestyle, that's why. And because they want to keep you living in their towns and watching their TV programs. I don't have the money from your homophobic grocery store, Phil. It's not back there in the break room. Your money is in Ed's rightwing Bible camp. And in Pete's scary Super PAC. And Marsha's clothing retailer that makes T-shirts that rip off corporate logos for Jesus.

Can't you understand what's happening here? Don't you see what's happening? The gays aren't selling. They're buying! And why? Because we're panicking and they're not. They're picking up some bargains. Now, we can get through this thing all right. We've got to stick together, though. We've got to have faith in each other.

We've got to come together as a community. As Americans. In a heartwarming and life-affirming way. Then we can really stomp those bastards. We'll go after some other types too.

I've got a list.

The Clarifications Of Pat Robertson - A Celebration


Is it right to call for assassination? No, and I apologize for that statement. I spoke in frustration that we should accommodate the man who thinks the U.S. is out to kill him.
- Press Release, 8/24/05

Pat Robertson expresses his deep sadness over Ariel Sharon’s life threatening stroke and concern for Israel’s future security... According to his spokesperson, Angell Watts, Robertson is simply reminding his viewers what the Bible has to say about efforts made to divide the land of Israel. She also expressed Dr. Robertson’s outrage at People for the American Way, who have a clear left-wing political agenda and who, on an ongoing basis, lift his comments out of context and widely circulate them in an attempt to discredit him.
- Press Release, 1/5/06

However, I ask your forgiveness and the forgiveness of the people of Israel for remarks I made at the time concerning the writings of the holy prophet Joel and his view of the inviolate nature of the land of Israel... My zeal, my love of Israel, and my concern for the future safety of your nation led me to make remarks which I can now view in retrospect as inappropriate and insensitive in light of a national grief experienced because of your father's illness.
- Letter to Omri Sharon, 1/11/06

His comments were based on the widely-discussed 1791 slave rebellion led by Boukman Dutty at Bois Caiman, where the slaves allegedly made a famous pact with the devil in exchange for victory over the French. This history, combined with the horrible state of the country, has led countless scholars and religious figures over the centuries to believe the country is cursed. Dr. Robertson never stated that the earthquake was God’s wrath.
- Press Release, 1/13/10

Please know that I believe the Bible. Please know that I never would tell anybody to leave their sick spouse. I never never would say such a thing because I need my spouse when I get sick and she needs me when she gets sick.
- Quoted in Christian Today Australia, 9/28/11

Dr. Robertson did not call for the decriminalization of marijuana. He was advocating that our government revisit the severity of the existing laws because mandatory drug sentences do harm to many young people who go to prison and come out as hardened criminals.
- CBN spokesman quoted by PRWEB, 12/24/10

On Thursday of last week, as The 700 Club continued its coverage of the tragic attack on the World Trade Center by radical extremists... The 700 Club producers had booked Jerry Falwell for a satellite interview. Rev. Falwell’s initial remarks were completely in accord with what had been said in preceding parts of the program, and then, unexpectedly, he uttered a political statement of blame directed at certain segments of the population that was severe and harsh in tone, and, frankly, not fully understood by the three hosts of The 700 Club who were watching Rev. Falwell on a monitor... Rev. Falwell has issued a pointed clarification of his statement, and Dr. Robertson said on Fox News’ The Edge that he considered the remarks "totally inappropriate." He does not wish to comment further on something that is not personally in keeping with the spirit of prayer and sorrow that has been evidenced by the staff of the Christian Broadcasting Network over the past several days.
- Press Release, 9/18/01

These questions and my concern in no way indicated that I was supporting Charles Taylor... I regret that my sentiments in support of the suffering Liberian people were misinterpreted by The Washington Post as unqualified support for Charles Taylor, a man whom I have never met, and about whose actions a decade ago I have no firsthand knowledge.
- Press Release, 7/16/03

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Dear Libertarians: America A Century Ago Was Not The Utopia You Think It Was

It's tempting to think that everything will work out if we downsize the government to a staff of 50 guys to fix highways and a few part-time Coast Guardsmen to keep their eye on Canada. That way companies can focus on creating jobs without costly, needless regulation. Here's the thing, though.

That has totally been tried. And it didn't actually work. I know, I know!

Believe me, I'm as shocked as you guys. But there is evidence:





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